During a time of year characterised by family gatherings and days spent with friends, the Christmas period is often filled with good company and connection. However, for many, this isn't always a reality.
Phillipa Brown, psychologist, chief executive, and founder of MeHelp Psychology, says it's not uncommon for the festive season to exacerbate feelings of loneliness.
"People might have recently moved or not have seen their loved ones in a whole year. Things might have changed, there might have been life transitions, a separation, or grief. Some people don't have family to see, or it might be their first Christmas without someone they love," Ms Brown said.
Even if you are surrounded by people during Christmas, feelings of loneliness can still manifest. "Loneliness isn't just about being alone," Ms Brown said. "It's about feeling disconnected, for some people. And for some reason, Christmas tends to magnify that."
THE GIFT OF REACHING OUT
Even if you're not personally experiencing feelings of loneliness during the festive season, chances are, someone in your life is. Give the gift of connection this Christmas and beyond, by making a conscious effort to reach out to those around you.
"Tell people why you're glad that they exist. Tell people why you're grateful to have them in your life. If you feel like someone is struggling in any capacity, don't think that Christmas is just going to be a happy time for every single person," Ms Brown said. "Have a think about those who might have been struggling this year, those who have been trying their best to make things work and have had a really hard time in doing so. Maybe they haven't said anything, but you've noticed it. Those people are the most important to reach out to this Christmas."
A message of gratitude and the invitation to grab a coffee or go for a walk can make a huge difference to someone who is struggling. Ms Brown says it's not just about a once-off check-in, but rather consistently reaching out and giving people the chance to open up and feel comfortable. "You don't know how much that can change someone's week, day, or year," she said.
CREATE YOUR OWN CONNECTION
If you're worried that feelings of loneliness may take hold, Ms Brown recommends intentionally making contact with the people in your life. "If we reach out to someone, even if it's a message or a call to say something like, "I'm thinking of you", that's a way to create a connection," Ms Brown said. "It's about being intentional about reaching out to people and not waiting for those invitations."
You can also plan small routines, whether that be grabbing morning coffee with a neighbour, going for lunch with a friend, or making a call to a family member who lives away. "These tiny interactions, they count," Ms Brown said. "Interaction and connection regulate the nervous system. If you're talking to someone, that helps to reduce the emotional overload."
If it's not possible for you to spend time with family or friends, you can also consider joining a community space. "There are always local community lunches or neighbourhood events. Many councils and charities tend to host Christmas Day gatherings or events leading up to Christmas. Maybe it's a great time to find new connections," Ms Brown said.
If you are feeling lonely this Christmas, you are not alone. Remember that support is always available. Online telehealth companies like MeHelp are available over Christmas and can provide professional support when you need it. "We know that mental health does not take a break," Ms Brown said. "We have some fantastic psychologists who are even working on Christmas Day."
If you or someone you know is in need of support, contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636.
